"Hold" | Reflection by Maureen Wagner

For decades, my father hung a St. Christopher medal in his car. It had been blessed by Pope John XXIII, and he hoped it would guarantee his safe commute to Hartford each day.  Although he had been raised a Roman Catholic, this attachment to a medal seemed odd to me. It was the only outward sign of a faith gone underground.  When my father gave up driving, he passed the medal on to me, eliciting my promise to keep it in my car for the protection St. Christopher was sure to offer.  Many decades and a few cars later, the medal still hangs from my rearview mirror, the tiny patinated image of St. Christopher holding the Christ child as he carried Him safely across the river.  Before driving off in my car, I often hold the medal in my hand for a moment and think of my father.

As humans we are able to hold things in our hands, people in our arms, and ideas in our brains. We are able to hold on to lovely memories, family traditions, professional accomplishments and our faith in God. However, I often find myself holding on to what does not serve me - uncertainty, fear, and loss.  This past year has truly challenged me to sort through what is worth holding and what is worth leaving behind - a kind of decluttering of my life - an inward inventory of what really matters. During this time, I have found myself drawn closer to membership in a faith community and a deeper and more prayerful relationship with God. 

It has been a long year and our muscles, both mental and physical, are exhausted from holding on, holding tight, holding it together. But we do so because we have faith that things will get better.  We hold on because we are resilient, resourceful, and blessed. During this most holy season of Lent, we are called to hold God in our heart, our loved ones in our memories, and our deep losses as a reminder of what is truly important.

Words in the Wilderness - Walk through the season of Lent with Trinity, one word at a time. Every day (except on Sundays) we will post a photo and a brief refection written by someone in our Trinity community. https://www.trinitynewhaven.org/words-in-the-wilderness